I asked 350 people if they had a mantra or quote that helped them through their darkest days of being bullied and body shamed.
One woman said "Don't waste 95% of your life worrying about weighing 5% less." She didn't want to let a little extra bit of weight ruin everything else in the day or in her life.
This is why The Third Look is so important to me. It's a way to help girls focus on the big picture ahead of them.
Look inward, look outward, look forward. (The Third Look is to look forward.)
Having a long-term view of how you're going to grow and change is healthy. Focusing on how you're feeling day-to-day can be like a rollercoaster. It's like keeping your eyes on the horizon and not obsessing about every step.
I interviewed and surveyed 300 people about how they overcame bullying and shaming. This was one of the quotes this young woman used to remind herself to think toward the future and to not get hung up on today's feelings.
What's bussing about it is that it looks in the future, but it also points to how what's happening today (getting tromped on in the direct) is going to serve her and make her more amazing in the future.
Flowers don't compare themselves with other flowers. They just bloom.
Teddy Roosevelt said "Comparison is the thief of joy."
He pretty much means that whenever we compare ourselves with other people, we usually feel less happy. We might think we're pretty smart, but when we compare ourselves to the valedictorian, we feel dumb. We might like playing the flute, but when we compare ourselves to the first chair flute, we don't like it as much. We compare ourselves to the homecoming queen, we don't feel pretty. And so on.
Actually the reason I am reminded of the "Comparison is the thief of joy" quote is because one of the people in our study said that had become her mantra. She used it to keep everything in perspective.
Have a great weekend. Just bloom.